Ok, so you know what kind of base you want. Now how do you pick the right brand? As it turns out, a lot of well known commercial lubricants are made in a base of heavily concentrated petrochemicals which can be toxic to a healthy vaginal ecosystem. So how can you know if the lubricant is safe?

Recent studies have shown that one of the most important factors in lubricant safety is iso-osmolar.

Remember osmosis from biology? Osmolality is about the salt balance or in other words, the flow of water between the cells. When the chemicals in the lube are too dense compared to the cells of vaginal lining, the water inside the cells is sucked out to balance the pressure. So hyperosmolar lubricants made with a lot of petrochemicals will draw the water out of cells in the mucous membranes of your cells, causing the top layers of the epithelium to slough off. This can create a toxic environment for the protective lactobacilli which is keeping bad bacteria at bay. This can cause a serious imbalance which pushes up your normally low pH and increases your risk of bacterial vaginosis as well as your risk for contracting STIs.

According to the World Health Organization, the osmolarity of lubricants should not exceed 380 mOsm/kg, and yet most commercial lubricants ring in at 2000-6000 mOsm/kg! That’s way denser than bodily fluids.

Look at the labels on the lubricants you purchase and seek out products made with natural ingredients instead of petrochemicals. Also most lubricants with any kind of “warming” sensation are generally hyper osmolar. Avoid lubricants with glycerin as the primary ingredient because it is associated with yeast infections. Try to find something that is organic and natural for the most sensitive tissue in your body.

Myth: “Vaginal dryness just means you’re not turned on enough”

Vaginal dryness is one of the most common reasons women have pain with sex – many factors can cause dryness, such as stress, alcohol, many types of medications, and common hormonal changes (like during or after menstruation!). Also, the idea that arousal can be measured by “wetness” makes some people uncomfortable with using lube. While foreplay can often ease this situation, there are many times when “natural lubrication” isn’t always enough. Knowing that a good lubricant will prevent painful sex is a great reason to start experimenting to see how lovemaking can be more both longer and more pleasurable for both partners. Don’t let any stigma keep you back from experiencing pleasurable sex!

Myth: “Lube isn’t necessary”

Lube makes penetration better for everyone. It allows you to try more positions and extend the comfort of the sensitive tissue for less friction and more glide. That extra glide can actually make it easier to orgasm. For anal sex, lube is a must-have because the anus has no natural lubricant and tearing rectal tissue can be super painful, so you want to be extra careful.

Myth: “Just use coconut oil”

Coconut Oil makes a decent lubricant because it is cheap and accessible, however, because it is oil-based it is not compatible with latex condoms and it can be a struggle to clean up. Additionally, it is more dense than say, aloe, and can clog pores as well as disrupt the delicate pH balance of vaginas.

Myth: “Saliva is the only lubricant I need”

Let’s be real, the most commonly used lubricant is spit. Aside from being readily available and free, there are not a lot of good reasons to keep using saliva during sex. For one, it dries up incredibly fast, can cause yeast infections in vaginas, may pass sexually transmitted infections, and last but not least, could be a turn off for some people. Check with your partner and see if they’re comfortable before using spit.